Weinland Watch

Weinland Watch

“Do As I SAY, Not As I DO.”

From the not-so-hallowed halls of the (Night of the) Living (Dead) University, we hear an alleged report of the latest alleged conflagration to leak out from behind the iron curtain of Spanky’s little concentration camp.

To wit, this picture of a faculty member on the bible college’s website apparently has church members somewhat alarmed.

For those who have never been involved in a closed, high-demand Church of God splinter group before, allow me to elucidate exactly what this woman’s obvious “sins” are, for which any of the average lay-members would be instantly and immediately disfellowshipped:

  • “Happy New Year” party hat
  • Bright red lipstick
  • Definite list to one side, suggesting that ain’t a water glass in front of her

All of which, combined, tells us that this faculty member of (Night of the) Living (Dead) University (in other words, an elder’s wife, or someone higher up in the echelons of church government’s “authority”) was snapped having a grand old time at a New Year’s bash.

The problem with this is that CoG members believe (OK not so much believe, as have it browbeaten into them) that the Common Era New Year’s celebration is actually descended from the pagan Saturnalia. In other words, to be absolutely 100% avoided at all costs.

I’m not sure whether makeup is in again or out again at LCG, but guaranteed she would get some strange looks for that lipstick, if it was “out” again.

Then we have the listing to the left, suggesting the woman has had more than a couple. That she has had a considerable amount to drink is not the issue of course, as alcohol is the ONLY acceptable vice in the Churches of God, and one that is applied liberally by virtually all of the members and ministry alike. It isn’t the empty wine glass in front of her that is quirking eyebrows.

No, instead, the listing to the left, and being caught on camera doing so, is what is known in CoG parlance as “the appearance of evil”. As in, just don’t give it! You can be a serial murdering psychopathic assassin-for-hire, but so long as you don’t give the appearance that you are, it’s gawd’s kingdom for you, all the way!

Of course, the fact that this woman is a faculty member, and therefore a de facto member of church government, is why she gets away with activities that would have any one of the average tithe slaves in Living immediately disfellowshipped. Yet not only does she obviously get away with what CoG members consider spiritual “murder”, she even gets to flaunt it.

Moral of the story?

When it comes to the Churches of God, follow the rules without question!  Obey, obey, obey!!!!

Unless you’re a member of the Levitical priesthood (or the wife of a member of the Levitical priesthood), in which case you’re absolutely 100% exempt and free from the poverty, the misery, and the fear, in which case you can (and will) just go ahead and do whatever the hell you want.

That doesn’t seem very balanced, now does it?

Ambassador Watch has its own opinion of the kerfuffle: Party Hearty!


Written by weinlandwatch

July 11, 2008 at 8:36 pm

Posted in Uncategorized

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